To Bae or not to Bae … Can you afford this?


Now I never really understood the meaning of bae (I really still don’t) but I recently saw sagachristos’ ‘To boo or not to boo’ and I thought to myself, the ladies definitely have to strike back!!! Btw if you read it I fall in the ‘His grace is enough’ category ūüė• and yes we still need to get a bae soon so this time we are determining our bride price. They think they can handle us but we may need them to make up for certain areas they lack by trying to compensate our family for making us lower our standards :p (Yeah I went there!).

As this is not typical me I’m finding it hard to come up with figures (also because I’m superpriceless ūüėČ ) so I took some categories they considered and put a spin on others plus a few I made up. Again I’m doing this to alleviate (check a dictionary :p) my boredom and erase the last traces of writer’s block and NOT to get on anyone’s nerves or under anyone’s skin … Lol! Okay so I’ll go back to semi normal after this I promise (fingers crossed) ūüėÄ

The bride price starts at  7 million (just to be fair -_-). Here goes nothing X_X

Age:       21 Р25 (-N500,000.00)
25 – 32 (N0.00)
Above 32 (+N500,000.00)

Looks
Body Shape:¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬† Fit + Rock Solid Body (N0.00) ¬†¬†¬†¬†¬† *side note: I need a ‘pillowable’ body guys ūüėÄ
Fit + Okay body – Pot belly (-N100,000.00)
Pot belly + Flabby (+N500,000.00)
BONUS: Teddy bear ‘wrap-me-able’ (-N250,000.00) ¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬† *side note: I’m a sucker for hugs!!!

Body Form:        Skinny                   (+N200,000)
Superbuff           (+150,000)
Teddy bearish   (N-100,000)
Romance novel specimen (N0.00) ¬† ¬† ¬† ¬† ¬† ¬†(for example see below and no I haven’t read this one. I just googled it)

COver
*side note: Too much wahala to keep my jealousy in check *shrugs*

Face:     Super cute and head turning (-N500,000)
Ehhn just okay (-N100,000)
If I look again there’s something about you (+N350,000)
Beauty is in the eye of the holder (+N750,000)
Beauty is on the inside (Lemme just say +N1,000,000)

Height: ¬† ¬† ¬† ¬† ¬† ¬† ¬† ¬† Tall – 6’1 to 6’4 ft¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬† (+N100,000)
Average – 5’8 to 6’1 ft¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬† (-N230,000)
Short – 5’5 to 5.7 ft¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬† (+N187,236.98)
Not in any category                         (+N239,765.37)

Dress Code:        Boy Band Cute (+N100,000)
Smart and sophisticated but with your own twist (-N70,000)
Gangster (+500,000)
BONUS: Sagging is the in thing mentality (+500,000)

Complexion: ¬†¬†¬†¬† I’ll be nice not to discriminate but
If I can’t see you in the dark ¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬† (+N500,000)
If I can’t see you under the sun¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬† (+N1,000,000)

Gifting Talent:   Everything Pink (+N100,000)

Cliche gifts – Flowers and Chocolates only (+150,000)
Gifts unique to me (-N350,000)                 *side note: Yeah yeah, we all want that :p

BONUS: Can cook well   (-N200,000)

 

Sense of humour:            Totally hilarious                                 (-N400,000)

Can always make me laugh          (-N550,000)

Laughs at everything                      (N0.00)

King of dry jokes                              (+100,000)

What does laughter feel like?     (+N500,000)

 

Language control:            Very good spoken and written English РAccent (-N300,000)

Average spoken and written English – Accent (-N100,000)

Above criteria + Slight accent (N0.00)

Hayvee Hassent (+N350,000)

Abeg na me and my guys jus dey yan (+450,000)

English hard o (+750,000)

 

God Level:          God speaks to me (Not pick up line :p )                  (-N500,000)

Me and God are cool                                                      (-N100,000)

I aint there but i’m getting there¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬† (N0.00)

Abeg all that one na yan, man gats hustle             (+N500,000)

 

Brain Level:¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬† Genius¬† (-N350,000)¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬†¬† *side note: you can’t always be right though. Take note!

Relatively Average (-N100,000)

Average (N0.00)

Typical jock (+N250,000)

Video games are my future (+N500,000)

 

Monthly Income:             Salary Earner I can afford you and me     (-N400,000)

Salary Earner I can take care of myself just okay                (-N100,000)

Salary Earner I can barely afford myself (N0.00)

Monthly allowance from the folks            (+N250,000)

Sometimes business doesn’t show fruits maybe next month¬†¬† (+N425,000)

 

Okay this thing is hard work I’m tired X_X. Anyway you get the drift. So take the small starting price and get adding (or subtracting) and lemme know who can get lower than 3 million :* :* :* plus I was super nice to put in small bonuses :D. Can you afford it? *evil grin*

Love you guys! Boundary II coming up soon. And don’t forget to leave your thoughts.

Hmmm … I wonder how much sagachristos can knock off …

Boundaries I


This particular post is way overdue and I want to first send a shoutout to @_shimuel who constantly reminded me that I was supposed to put this up and finally I have! :D. Thank you for your persistence and this Ghanaijachic appreciates your belief and dedication in this!

Now let’s begin!

The first thing that comes to your mind when you hear boundaries is restriction – at least that’s what comes to my mind . Limitations and rules are two other very likely words but no one immediately thinks of protection. The thing is God has set boundary lines for us and instead of thinking about how much this ‘limits’ you remember they have fallen for you in pleasant places meaning that whatever you do within these boundary lines is not supposed to ‘steal’ your joy! Boundaries give you identity – This is me, my gifts, values, feelings, needs, beliefs, etc.

Psalm 16:7
‘The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places, surely I have a delightful inheritance.

There are five major boundaries that you must set for yourself and not cross. I learnt an acronym for that and its – PRESS.

Personal Space

Personal Boundaries: Personal boundaries are the hardest to set because they involve me controlling me. It’s easy to make excuses and readjust boundaries we set for ourselves as we please but sometimes we need to be disciplined. The most important personal boundary to me is controlling your tongue.

Mat 12:36 – 37
‘But I say unto you, That every idle word that men shall speak, they shall give account thereof in the day of judgment. For by thy words thou shalt be justified, and by thy words thou shalt be condemned.’

Thinking about the fact that I would be judged based on everything that comes out of my mouth makes me think twice before i utter anything. Another thing is letting my yes be yes and my no, no. It simply means I must be a person of integrity. Whatever it is that would compromise my integrity, I choose to be apart from. Think of what personal boundaries you need to set and remember setting personal boundaries does not mean shutting people out!

 

Relational Boundaries: Man is a social being and no man is an island. We therefore need to relate with each other in this world but one principle everyone understands is that ‘You are the company you keep’. Hanging around certain characters all the time would ensure that you pick up those characters whether you like it or not.

1Cor 15:33
‘Be not deceived: evil communications corrupt good manners.’

5 rules

Don’t use that as an excuse though to¬† be ‘unequally yoked’ with unbelievers. The truth of the matter is that for ‘yoked’ relationships, the two people (or more than two) have to have the same basic beliefs and if they disagree then the foundation is shaky. This is also not to say that Christians shouldn’t be friends with Buddhists and cast them out or they should torment Muslims because they are of different faiths but that you should set boundaries as to what kind of relationships you have with people and who you can get intimate with.

Emotional Boundaries: The hardest emotional boundary to set is ‘turning the other cheek’. I often debate within myself as to whether I should ignore when others hurt me in a bid to maintain peace or if it’s okay to get angry. I finally decided that if someone hurts me I’d tell them – maybe not there and then but just to get it off my shoulder and avoid keeping a grudge. If it’s no big deal, then fine I may not need to bring it up except it is a recurring habit. I also decided that par adventure I get angry, I shouldn’t speak in anger or make decisions in anger. Still don’t let people take advantage of you okay?

Control

Eph 4:26
Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath:’

 

I’ll end here for now – there are two more major boundaries you shouldn’t cross or you should set for yourself – Situational and Sexual and I’ll be talking about them in my next post along with some consequences of breaking boundaries. Leave a comment and let me know what you think abiout boundaries.

Ta ta for now!

 

Look Into My Eyes ….


I hate good byes – they hurt too much! This one is even more painful ‘cos i don’t have my glasses this time. Let me explain – See my glasses are my shield and my barrier from letting the world look into my soul. They say the eyes are the windows into the soul.
In other words, its easier to stay disconnected because my glasses give nothing away – tears welling in my eyes are not visible and so i can afford to joke about it and move on instead of getting all emotional touchy feely!

Eyes

That out of the way, I’ve noticed that we don’t look into people’s eyes anymore. As weird as it sounds, its one way people say ‘I trust you’ and in this generation, trust is a luxury. On the other hand, if you can look me in the eyes and still betray me then you simply are wicked!!!

Due to certain happenings this past week, I’ve learnt a lot about trust. My conclusion is – Don’t expect everyone to think like you. Give out little doses of trust and then let people work to build it. I guess this is the part we call the ‘benefit of the doubt’ so everyone starts my trust account with 1 and its up to you to build it or reduce it but the funny thing is that you can’t just maintain it.

images (1)

This is another session of rambling but right now I’m sort of heart broken – The Ghana part of this Ghanaijachic is coming to an end at least temporarily and it is literally tearing me apart. I sort of wish I didn’t look into so many eyes with my glasses off ‘cos it hurts but I don’t regret it! I love my Ghana fam – Until when next we meet¬† (seeing as I can’t type anymore as a result of cloudy eyes ūüė• ),

Forever Ghanaija!

P.S. Stop avoiding eyes by staring at your phone screens too!

P.P.S. I’m sorry for being REALLY irregular and I promise my next post would be by me!!

images

P.P.P.S I know it’ll pass but it hurts really bad right now!!! *sigh*

Love you guys!