Posted in Guest Write-Ins, Life, Tips

Who says ‘I love you’ first? – Day 11

Today’s random love thought is  by another amazing RANDOM writer. Someone (my mum X_X) told me to check out the blog and I saw a great piece for Love One Four so enjoy! Visit the website as well, its amazing!

P.S. Its another boss who has left blogging for the small children like me *sigh*

Love One-Four

I’m not sure how this applies in the Nigerian dating culture and I would be glad if someone enlightens me but I know in the western world, saying “I Love You” for the first time is a really big deal, I mean a huge deal in relationships and I’ve never really understood why people place so much emphasis on who says it first, how soon you say it and even where you say it. Now, I know this affects men and women in different ways so I’ll address the both angels.
Ladies First…
So here comes Angela and Segun who have been dating for 5 months and Segun is yet to say the three magic words. Angela starts to panic, “.. does he love me..? … should I say it first..? maybe he’s too shy to say it..? .. Oh God, he’s seeing another girl….” All these and even worse are the thoughts in Angela’s head. So what should she do?
Here is Segun, enjoying the relationship that he has going with Angela. Everything thing seems to be going well and he really does care about her but he is not yet at the commitment stage. One day, they are on a romantic date when Angela tells Segun “…babe, I have something I’ve been wanting to tell you..” (Segun begins to think.. Oh Oh….)

Angela: “Babe, I want you to know that I love you…”
Segun: Oh! .. **awkward silence**

Angela feels hurt that Segun did not say it back while Segun is scared that he’s now in trouble and the

relationship just got complicated.

See what I mean? Way too much complication. We attached unnecessary value to irrelevancies in our relationships. Who says I love you first is irrelevant and has nothing to do with the success of a relationship. You know why? Because people lie! All the time! What if Segun says “I love you too..” but he really doesn’t? People can say and do anything just to get what they want and to please the other party. Saying I love you these days is not a guarantee of anything. So stop complicating issues and just go with it. On the other hand, what if Segun starts acting like the sun rises and sets on his behind all because Angela said the words first?

Someone once said that whoever says “I love you” first in the relationship is in the weakest link. DogShit! That’s a whole load of crap that people just feed you without even understanding your own scenario. You have to understand that relationships vary from person to person. What works for A is not necessarily going to work for B. So don’t run your relationship the same way Sade does hers, you’ll only get one result: disaster!

Here’s what I think, it’s not even an issue; just say it! If you are convinced enough that you feel that strongly for that person then just say it. You can only get three responses:
(1) I love you too,
(2) The person is almost at the same place with you, and
(3) the person doesn’t love you now, and isn’t going to any time soon.
Based on whatever the response you get is, just keep on moving. And even if he/she says it back, talk is cheap. It’s the person’s actions towards you that will tell you whether he/she really does love you or not. But either way, stop treating your relationship with some 12 steps that you read in a book and attaching meaning to who says it first because if you are both meant to be together, such things would be irrelevant.

Most importantly, If you love someone, just tell them because today is given but tomorrow is not guaranteed

Tomorrow, Love One Four continues with ‘So whats the point of Love’ by Nkechi! Bye guys 😀

Posted in Guest Write-Ins, Life

Why I don’t love my fiance – Day 10

Today’s random love thought is reblogged from I stumbled across it and its perfect!!! Enjoy ‘Why I don’t love my fiance’ 😀

Love One-Four

Michael J. Pittman

In 130 days I’m getting married, and a friend recently asked me why I love my fiancé. I wanted to share a deeper perspective on Amanda and I’s relationship, so before I answered why I love her, I had to first explain to him the reasons I don’t love my future bride to be.

I came to two conclusions:
First is, I don’t love Amanda for what’s on the outside. I know. It sounds cheesy, it sounds sappy. This perspective is not a novel idea by any means. How many times have you heard someone say, “I don’t love you for what’s on the outside. I love you for what’s on the inside.” But that brings me to my second conclusion.

I don’t love Amanda for what’s on the inside either.

Now don’t get me wrong, there are many things on the inside and outside that I love about

View original post 888 more words

Posted in Guest Write-Ins

21st Century Fairy Tale II – Day 9

This was written by a dear friend and brother of mine. He’s also a very funny person! 😉 So here’s a guy’s view of 21st Century Fairy tale. His name’s Ezekiel and he likes life ‘Ezzy Ezzy’! Here it is …

Love One-Four

Have you observed that at some certain stages in life, all or most of what you hear about is a particular thing or are particular things or people. As a child, between ages five to nine, all you hear about are -the best primary schools, the most ‘wicked’ teacher in school, the newest biscuits and candies, the newest cartoons and sometimes the most ‘wicked’ parent.

As a teenager and sometimes even the young adult, your life seems to revolve around a lot of things especially being noticed and your emotions. Today when the word ‘love’ is mentioned it takes the minds of young adults to someone (a person) and not an expression of the mind itself.

Every time the word love is mentioned, no matter where or when, Bisi feels her heart skip a beat and some warmth going around her heart. Ebuka is all Bisi thinks about, the driving around town in his car, shopping together, having ice-cream together, pecking and kissing wherever (Dear reader, Bisi and Ebuka aren’t in Nigeria else …).Ebuka seems to be the best thing that happened to Bisi and now to Bisi the true sign of love is shopping and spending and romancing. Like Bisi, many young adults think love is the shopping, spending and romancing. What if Bisi’s idea of love is right? I guess it’s only in the 21st century.

Right now, I don’t know who’s coming up tomorrow so I’ll be as surprised as you 😉 Catch you all tomorrow 😀 Check out 21st Century Fairytale I as well. 🙂